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Obituary for Nellie Whirlpool

6/11/2018

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Recently, my appliances have been teaming up against me. First the dishwasher quit, then the washer and dryer. Last week when the washer died, she was in the middle of a cycle and full of water! AND she was a front loader! After I gave her a few swift kicks, I thought to myself So much for Nellie Whirlpool and that is where the idea for this post came from. Creative inspiration is everywhere :)

Obituary for Nellie Whirlpool

Nellie Whirlpool expired this week. The cause of death is unknown, but an autopsy revealed she was full of mold. There is also speculation that she may have choked on a mouth full of clothes. She was quite picky. It would be nice to say she lived a long and full life, but the truth is she was lazy, did not live up to her potential, and expired young. There is some comfort in her death, knowing that she was accompanied by her partner, June Whirlpool. June was under severe distress and frequently became severely overheated. She also expired at an unusually young age with a mouth full of unmatched socks. Both Nellie and June were preceded in death by Frankie Frigidaire who at the tender age of 10 decided she was quite finished with life. She became sluggish, leaked on the floor, and expired with a belly full of very dirty dishes. The three of them have been replaced and will not be remembered fondly.

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